Wednesday, June 3, 2009

A day of movies

I don't get out much, me.

What with being hopelessly poor and unemployed (not for lack of trying) I don't get to the cinema as much as I'd like - the cost in London is at least £8 per movie, and seeing as how I can't afford the £16.50 a month for an unlimited pass - I'm on cereal at lunch time as it is - it is a rare thing indeed when I get to see so many films as I did this Sunday.

Major props need to go to my buddies Dave & Dave (genuinely), who helped me out with the prices of the tickets so I could see three new movies in an afternoon, which is near enough to my idea of heaven.

Appropriate then, that the one that was any good was Drag Me To Hell - Sam Raimi's morality tale about greed and consequences.

And the importance of taking your mother off speakerphone.

The others, Tormented and 12 Rounds were not so good, the former being lame and uninteresting, the latter being a remake of Die Hard With A Vengeance (sans any acknowledgement, natch.) with a wrestler in the lead role and, predictably, less charisma.

Reviews of the movies will be up in a bit - but I was really pleased to get back to the cinema . I love the whole experience; from ignorant queue jumpers who ask to see the "BeyoncĂ© movie" (I believe it's called, Obsession) to shaking your head at the frankly balls out rip off that is £3.15 for a watered down cup of SodaStream.

So, forget that two of the three movies were lame - the company was good, the seats were good, and the whole experience brings a warm feeling to my heart.

So reignited was my passion for films that when I got home I watched two more - the kids film Night At The Museum (a nice way to spend Sunday evening) and later on, I introduced Mrs Algo to the joy and wonder that is Bride Of Frankenstein.

The downside - really weird dreams combining elements of all five films. A reanimated dinosaur with Frankenstein shouting "Rexy's Alive" who then kills a bunch of irritating schoolkids before kidnapping John Cena's wife and getting cursed by the freakiest lady ever.

(John Stewart impression) -

"Hello... Hollywood? I've got this great idea for a film...

What's it called? I'll tell you what it's called....

Drag the 12 Brides Of Frankenstein to the Tormented Museum of Hell.

Yes I'll Hold........."

The upside?

The name "Darren Mullet" will now be a signal for all rubbish slasher movie villains. And lazy shorthand is what got this country where it is today.

Here endeth the lesson.



  1. "Darren Mullet". Too funny.

    Good little article. Says just the right thing. :)

  2. How kind. Nice to know you're still reading after all the silent periods.